Public enemies is not Michael Mann, its johnny depp

Sherlock Holmes will not be Guy Ritchie, it will be RDJ

Defiance is not Ed Zwick, its Daniel Craig

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus is not Terry Gilliam, it is Heath Ledger. 

Blade II is not Guillermo Del Toro, its Wesley Snipes

Burn After Reading was not Coen Brothers, it was clooney and pitt. 

thats the way everyone in the universe sees it. its always like, to me whenever i hear that, "*facepalm*, thats not why i wanna see imaginarium" 

with the exception of people like Stephen Segal, sometimes Charles Bronson, and et-goddamn-cetera, that is never the case. i don't understand how that would ever be the case. people looking at things like that allowed Righteous Kill to make more than a dollar. Righteous kill does not deserve more than a dollar. 

But Tim Burton is different. i'm not talking about the way i look at, i mean every single person in the universe says alice in wonderla-TIM BURTON Before they say Johnny Depp.

Tim Burton is basically the only person in history for that to be the case. for every person in the universe to say his name Before they say the actor. 

cinema

its a language. thats what i've decided. it has its grammar, obviously. it also has its dialects. every sentence has an alternate phrasing. well, a million alternate phrasings. some people think they're hot stuff because they use big words, but its almost always far less interesting than people who do big interesting things with the smaller more common words. 

theres common phrases. phrases like "is it hot in here or is it just me?" or "so it goes" or "... right up your alley" and etc. etc. etc. 

it can be poetry, it can be dry prose. but even the dryest of dry prose has a slight resemblance to poetry, and a few poetic elements. its damn near impossible to strip it down to zero percent poetry, but thats arguable i suppose. 

its the only language everyone can read. think about that. 

most people take it for granted. the majority doesn't read to well. some of its heavy reading- you need a mega attention span, a high reading level, and dedication to achiechieving an understandment. others is light- yaknow. 

but its very different. you'd have to stretch the meaning of the word "communicate" to apply it to film, but i'm sure there are those that would say so. its basically impossible to have a conversation in that language (but i would love to watch one happen). 

some people don't see it as a language. some movies you oughtta say "hey, why isn't it a novel? why not a play?"

 if a story's crafting is magnificient- the script was a work of beautiful genius literature, yet in the execution it had no sense of cinematicals, besides a room-stage with cameras. would that be a "good movie?"

 if an averagely literary but still no less concise and well-crafted script was made into a movie by a guy who was fluent in the language and played into its every nuance and was an honest work of cinema in every sense of the word, which would be "better"? 

hollywood's history is full of writers who wanted to be directors but never got that far.. maybe the ones who didn't make it were the ones who could craft a story better than they could tell it. or could tell it in the written word just not the screen. maybe its for the best they never directed. thats why John Milius, Paul Schrader, Quentin Tarantino pulled it off and did well for themselves. 

well, to be continued, i guess. . . ... . .. . . . .

i was sitting in my kitchen on the verge of inspirado, that appeared to be just barely out of reach, but at the same time maybe it was just a mirage. i was eating mozzarella cheese and it was 2:40some am. there was a spider on the roof n chandelier. . this is not a poem. this is not art. this is not an inspirational quote. it just happened. 

i should get back into bloggin again. . . . 

Photo Shop Kicks Booty

OverProduced

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Raw

Woah, Dude, Mr. Turtle Is My Father...

i just watched finding nemo, and no, i haven't been counting how many times that is now.

Crush is a great great character. i think so not cuz of the obvious reasons that the two of us talk similar, well that too, dude, but i think he's The singlemost major integral single contribution to Marlin's arc. (arguable, i know, challenge me if you wish.)

but mostly the way he is animated, facially, is why i think he's great. all his kinds of neck and eye movements just carry so much... wisdom. as they should, being a 150 yearold surf guru who makes the singlemost integral single contribution to Marlin's arc. Is there an element of wisdom in the way non-animated turtles look? probably. i 

don't know, all non-animated turtles are a waste of my time...

but his facial expression and dialogue, not just dialect but all other kinds 

of wordchoice, makes me think that he knows he's being soo damn wise and integral-​to-​character-​arc.​ but, naturally, the first few billion times through watching it you might not say that. just that he was being himself,

stating his own mind, and it happened to come across as a kind of pseudo-wisdom to marlin at the time, for whatever reason. but this past time through, the few-​billion-​and-​one'​th time through, it may have been my imagination, but i saw it in that dude's

 eyes, man. he knows just exactly how wise and integral he is being to the Jellyman. when you've been cruisin the E.A.C. for 150 years, you reach a level of wisdom n junk soooo far beyond what you could possibly comprehend now, probably. i'll bet, that kind of surf-turtle-guru level of magic is Exactly how much magic it takes for me to see, or even think i saw, something like Wisdom in animated eyes

This is the worst possible photo of him they could have ever picked -to be the number one major promotional recognizable face-of-the-film google image result. it carries nothing of what this post is about. Obviously the doing of Pixar's rich booksmart soulless stepmother...

Fittingly, The Director of the film himself, Andrew Stanton, provided the voice acting. he also did wall-e, and some other stuff, but i'm not 1000% on top of the which-directors-did-what thing. once inside pixar, i consider them all one singular (x)-part director, cuz they always seem to be workin with some kinda co-director or several writers, and always small church of animators. they just strike me as a team force much more than a classroom.

well, most of them screenshots, even the good ones, did not do the whole thing justice what i was goin for. it must be in the movement of the drawings, but, well, keep it in mind the next time you watch it, i guess.

SUMMARY

Life Lessons i Learned from Crush: the wisest of turtles are satisfied, and sometimes even prefer, being under-appreciated as not the wisest of turtles; merely the raddest. 

I dare you to try and Tell me that that face doesn't realize how integral he is to The Jellyman's Character Arc. just try it.

mrs. potatohead mrs. potatohead mrs. po- WOW! i gotta shave!

after years of half of a halfway thought out list that was filled with mistakes and hypocricies and intercontradictions, i've finally decided my one-thousand percent complete Pixar List.

well, not really... they're all ties in sets of 2's... you think this is disorganized you should of seen it before

1/2: Toy Story/Finding Nemo

3/4: Incredibles/Cars

5/6: Wall-E/Toy Story 2

7/8 Monsters Inc./Ratatoillie

9: Bugs Life.

i'm really really psyched for UP. 

but i'm much much more psyched for the Toy Story 1&2 double feature two-fer-one Converted to 3D in theaters in october

lovecraft, guillermo, and i

Guillermo Del Toro is shooting H.P. Lovecraft's At The Mountains of Madness sometime mid-late twentyteens. 

If you don't know the Cthulhu Mythos, it all involves creatures of literally unimaginable everything. They are made of a 5th form of matter, and they look like colors from an unknown spectrum. Also, they're city, R'leyh, is constructed with Non-Euclidean Geometry.. ..

Guillermo has said on some internet i've read that he's already got artists and i'd imagine geometrists working on the creatures and the city. 

its gonna be the greatest lovecraft adaption in the history of lovecraft

probably the greatest horror film, scifi film, fantasy film, and any combination of the 3 in the history of film.

you should read lovecraft. 

Anyway, i was thinkin. . . just musin, in general. . 

I think my dream job would be to score that emmeffer. 

think about it, Guillermo, as usual, knows exactly how to get the art department to be cash money and perfect every time. In weird fiction films, The Art Department is the most underrated department, and when the directors don't realize this it shows, but thats why Guillermo, in spirit with his ilk of yesteryear most particularly romero and carpenter, is the effin man. 

I just hope he's that way with scoring.

if basil poleduris (guy who scored conan the barbarian, red dawn, robocop, starship troopers) was a huge lovecraft fan and didn't die in 2005, he would be the man.

if The Cthulhu Mythos are based on light and colors of an unknown spectrum and non-euclidean architecture and a 5th form of matter, wouldn't the sound have to be of an unknown spectrum? non-euclidean music? a sound the dictionary definitions of neither 'music' nor 'dissonance' can do justice? 

on Avatar, another film that isn't out yet that i believe i've referenced in an older post, James horner (he scored titanic and aliens and a bunch of others) is declining all other offers for a long time. AN ENTIRE YEAR working on nothing but this film. he is literally calling in ethnomusicologists, experts on music/culture and culture/music, to develop an entire musicculture/culturemusic for this alien species. 

THAT is the bare minimum amount of time dedication hardwork and inspirado for someone to score Guillermo Del Toro's At The Mountains of Madness.

if i were guillermo del toro, i'd say to my scorer "alright, give me sound from an unknown spectrum. give me non-euclidean music. give me tones that the known world have not yet discovered because they traveled through space so long ago and so far that they practically classified as 'dimensional travel', but most schools of though say it was just space travel. give me a sound neither "musical" or "dissonant". use instruments that don't exist, tones that literally no one has heard before. play an H#+˚ in a phrygian dominant major." 

and the scorer will look at him and say "uh, alright, yeah" but in his mind/under his breath go 'you freakin weirdo' and give 'im some by-the-book junk, interpreting/oversimplifying all these principles of the cthulhu mythos as 'well, i'll just go with the diminished scale' because he can't, or won't bother, think outside the box. (The diminished scale is a widely exploited alternative to thinking outside the box. in my experiences with thrash music and riff-mongrels)

They'll probably call in elfman or zimmer or somebody and they will most likely tear it up, but they will be doing just another project, just another gig. . . 

**disclaimer: danny elfman and hans zimmer are bad to the bone. i aint trashin on them. just clarifying.**

HEY GUILLERMO, if they get internet in new zealand, and you stumble upon this, i really really hope you've already thought through all of this and you're reading stuff you already know.  but dude, call me up, i'll drop everything and work from now till the film actually gets made, and then work some more and do this. i picked up your call of cthulhu reference in hellboy (well, who didn't) and i want you to know that i picked up your mountains of madness reference in hellboy II. comeon man, i'll do it! :)  . . .

i guess.. .